Final Project

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ASI8zt24JpY

"Us Time" ?!

FINALLY the hubby and I got away for just enough time to watch a movie together! As sad as this may sound we haven't seen a movie in 4 MONTHS and this is coming from the couple who would go to the movies weekly.  The best part of it all was that we lied to his mother about having something important to do so she can watch the baby when in reality all we wanted to do was eat some popcorn and watch FastFive! The truth of the matter is his mother would have watched her grandson no matter what we were doing but the thought of actually doing something for ourselves made it extremely necessary to sneak around, we felt like high school kids sneaking out of our bedroom windows...it was great =]

After our 3 hour getaway I noticed a friends status on Facebook stating that this is her last month of pregnant and that soon her new addition will arrive.  From one mother to the next I had to give her the best advice I could.  I told her to go out and spend a wonderful day or even weekend with her boyfriend, go to the movies, go out to eat or even just stay in and cuddle!  Do it now because before she knows it her days collide with her nights and even though she is living with her significant other it doesn't necessarily mean they will see much of each other. They must take the time to just soak up what they have because once the baby is here their relationship will be taken to the limit, and their love for each other must overcome any obstacles that may come in their way. 

... SIDS ...

Before you have a child the word "sleep" actually has a meaning to it.  As for me I don't think I have enjoyed a nice deep sleep like I use to way back in 2010.  And no, it is not because he cries all night because I have been blessed with an amazing baby who has been sleeping through out the night since he was 2 months old.  The reason is because I am absolutely petrified of SIDS!

SIDS, also known as Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, has taken over my brain and I hate it! Hundreds of babies just suddenly pass away in their sleep due to SIDS and the worst part of it all is that doctors really don't know what can cause or trigger it. It can only affect an infant in their first year of life and it's peaking months are between the 3rd and 6th month.

The thought of one morning just waking up and not finding him breathing has caused me so much agony that I invested in this wonderful product that I think every mother should have! It is a baby monitor called AngelCare and it comes with a sleeping pad.  Therefore if your child stops moving, or breathing for 20 seconds the alarm will go off warning you that your child is in danger.  It is a must have and truly helps any mother sleep better at night.

The Blessing of School

As weird as this may sound, I love making it to school! Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my son and spending time with him, however the balance of school and motherhood has really helped me stay sane in such a chaotic time in my life.  Being able to get away to school for a few hours allows me to remember that I am still a human being, that I still have dreams that I want to accomplish and that I am still Ulissa Suarez. 

Many times this semester making it to class just seemed like an impossible task due to the fact that I was mentally and physically drained! But whenever I was able to make it, the walls of St.John's became a place that would allow me to be the old Ulissa, a student just like everybody else and the only responsibility I have within those walls is to graduate.

Smoking While Pregnant

 Ughhh what a topic! It absolutely drives me crazy when I see a pregnant woman smoking cigarettes. After having been pregnant and hearing about so many things that can go wrong with the baby I couldn't imagine purposely putting my child in even more risk just to satisfy an addiction like smoking.   During my time in ICU with Ian I saw so many babies in such bad condition, and many of them were there due to their mother's choice to smoke cigs.

When a woman makes the choice to begin the journey of motherhood the first thing they must do is put their future child (whether they are pregnant or not) before them.  Supplementing all of the delicious cravings for soda, coffe, tuna, and so much more for water, leafy vegetables and fruits!  It's pretty much 9 months of what you CAN'T eat but in the end you manage to get by because you know that what you are doing is for your growing baby inside of you.

If you are smoking while pregnant then you are just indulging into a selfish act that will truly effect your child's breathing and lung growth at such a critical stage in his development.

Photoshop

Photo 1

  

Photo 2

   

Photo 3

 

Motherhood Vs. Career

      VS

This is a subject that came up in my Business of Television course that really hit home for me.  After graduation approaches many women are faced with this decision they must face; have a family or a career.  This is a huge choice in a woman's world and not too many people realize it.  If we choose a career we are frowned upon for not wanting to have a family and if we choose the family path people judge you for not working.  It seems to be a loose loose situation. 

When Ian came into the world I worried if I would be able to follow my dreams.  In one sense I feel as if I would be abandoning my duties as a mother if I were not there as much as a stay at home. However the best way I know I can provide for my son is by pursuing my dreams.  I have faith that I will find a balance in my role as a career woman and a mother when that time comes.  And all I am certain of is that I will make sure I am present for every baseball game, school play and holiday. 

I'm a mother, daughter, grand-daughter, girlfriend, student ...

I was extremely looking forward for my Spring Break.  I had vowed to do my school work and hang out with Ian all week.  Sadly enough, the Friday before spring break even began, my grandmother was rushed to the hospital.  As soon as I got the word my role as a grand-daughter kicked in and I knew I had to drop everything to go to the hospital. 

My paternal grandmother is a beautiful 89 year old Puerto Rican woman.  She has been blessed with five children and plenty of grandchildren and even great grandchildren. As a child growing up in Puerto Rico she helped her mother raise her younger siblings.  After living a great life and being such an important and strong figure in her family things began to change for her.  My family and I were blind to see the changes that my grandmother had made.  Her beans and rice would be burnt, she would forget a distant family members name.  We looked at these things as signs that she was getting old, 'Shit happens'.  But then it got to the point where she would be asking me for my grandfather who is standing next to her, or she would say it's time for her to go home when she is already home.  Even after the doctor diagnosed her with Alzheimers it still took a while to sink in.  My most precious times with my grandmother were when I would cuddle up in her lap and hear stories of life in Puerto Rico. 

Due to my grandmother's illness I stepped in and began to care for her.  I took her to ever doctors visit, cleaned her and gave her her medication.  I owe my grandmother so much for taking care of me that i vowed to stay by her side.  I spent the whole week in the hospital with my abuelita and even though I missed Ian I knew I had to switch gears for her. 

Daddy's Little Girl

As I celebrated my birthday this past Monday I could not help but look back and reflect on these past 23 years.  I have been truly blessed with amazing parents, Wilfredo Suarez and Shirley Ruiz, and with the most loving family and friends.  I was born and raised in the Lower East Side of Manhattan for a majority of my life and spent my high school years in Poconos, Pennsylvania.  The eclectic lifestyle of NY and the country lifestyle of PA helped shape me into the well rounded person that I am today.  After high school I decided to return to my hometown of NY for college and to also help take care of my paternal grandmother who has Alzheimer's, a disease I have become all too familiar with.  Being back in NY allowed for a relationship to ensue with my childhood crush Joshua Collado who is now the father of my beautiful son Ian Noah Collado, and my future husband.  As graduation approaches itself within a few months, I hope to find a job within my field of Advertising Communications and aspire to be an Account Executive one day.  

Exception To The Rule

As I sit here and write this blog entry I can't help but feel extremely exhausted from my long fun filled weekend of mommy duties! It is truly an amazing experience to have a child and be a mother but it is also extremely exhausting!! All the nights I partied in college could not prepare me for these all-nighters I pull daily.  Besides mastering my multi-tasking skills this past month I have also learned how to sleep on command because I am unsure of when is the next time I am capable of enjoying such a pleasure like sleep.

Taking care of a child is one job, but being a full time student as well seems like an impossible task.  I don't know how my body fines the energy to run to school and be a student after being a full time breast feeding mother to a 28 day old baby boy who is eating and pooping up a storm!  If it wasn't for this motivation to finish what I started for myself, my son and my family I don't know how I would be capable of doing what I am doing now.  One major help that I have is my amazing boyfriend Joshua.  As I sit and visit with friends they all ask me how am I managing school and motherhood and the first thing I say is JOSHUA.  He helps with night feedings and changes so I can get my rest and he also made his work schedule around my school schedule so that he could take care of Ian.  The responses I get are unbelievable! They all can't believe that a guy actually helps his girlfriend take care of their child! I have been told by every mother that the dad never changed a diaper or fed the baby a bottle and I couldn't believe it.  This whole month I thought that this is exactly how it should be for a couple with a new baby and yet the reality is we are an exception to the rule.  Without his help I do not know what I would do, so it got me thinking of all those women who have no help.  I respect them so much more because the job isn't an easy one and the fathers should be there helping their partner, no matter what their relationship status may be. 

As Valentine's Day and my 2 year anniversary with Josh approaches us within the next few minutes I can only count my blessings to know that I am one of the lucky women in the world to be blessed with such a great man like Josh; and even though we are saving all our money for bills and our son the best gift I could receive from him is simply his presence.  The thought of knowing he is here with me, every step of the way is all I can ask for.

2 + 1 = 3

On January 16, 2011 at 6:13 PM my whole life completely changed - 9 months of preparing for this moment did not prepare me at all for how much my life changed.  At exactly 6:13 PM when the doctor placed this little shriveled up crying baby on my chest I could not help but feel a part of my own soul leave me and enter this little body that stared at me with wondering eyes; and even though this was our very first time laying eyes on each other I couldn't help but feel the familiarity within his eyes.  It was as if I have been looking at him my whole life without knowing it.

As happy as I was to meet my son for the first time, I can not put behind the craziness that ensued before his arrival.  My life before Ian Noah was extremely perfect - I had just finished up a great internship at a creative branding firm called Brand Marketers and I was about to begin my senior year of college.  Graduating college has always been a dream of mine and I vowed that nothing would ever come between this dream.  Not only does it mean a lot to me but it also means a lot to my family; I will be the second college graduate from my maternal side (my mother being the first) and one of the very few from my paternal side.  With that being said - once my boyfriend and I found out that I was pregnant I couldn't help but feel excited as well as in a stand still.  A baby with my lovely boyfriend Josh was just want I wanted just not at the moment and the thought of dropping out of school didn't even enter my mind.  From the very beginning I knew that I wasn't going to have a care free senior year as I had hoped but as long as my boyfriend was on board with the plans I knew deep inside that things were going to fall into place. 

Once we saw our creation on our first sonogram all of our fears and concerns left us immediately and we knew no matter what that our cozy number of 2 wasn't complete without this person that was growing inside of me.  My son all of a sudden became a necessary component to our lives.  Once school started I didn't worry about how I was going to manage being pregnant and a full time student, I couldn't worry about morning sickness or being tired because things had to get, not for me anymore but for my child.  Not only did I pass last semester with 4 A's and a B + but I am also the secretary of the Advertising Club and put together various events with my fellow Eboard members.

Now that I proved to those who doubted me that I was capable of finishing up a semester while being pregnant - I must finished what I started 4 years ago.  I have to graduate college now, not only for myself and my family but for this amazing little boy who believes in me.  I want him to grow up knowing that he can accomplish anything that he puts his mind to and I must do that by giving him the best example that I know how.  Graduating college will only be sweeter knowing that I will have my parents, boyfriend and son there to witness it.